You Should Man Up

If you haven't seen the new Lebron commercial, watch it right now. Done? Good.

The new Lebron commercial, which you presumably just watched, more or less consists of Lebron asking the viewer "What should I do?" in a series of what Nike apparently considers jokes. Well, I've got what you should do right here Lebron (besides get your head out of your ass) - you should man up. I know, it's a foreign concept in the space between your ears. So in case you don't know how to man up in this situation, I'll help you out.

1. Stop making excuses for why people dislike you. It's not racism. It isn't jealousy. It's just not. Want to know what the real reason is? Because you sold out a whole franchise and city. Not to mention your hometown.
2. Apologize to Cleveland fans and the Cavaliers organization. They tried to build a franchise around you, more or less making you the Czar of the Cavs organization for the years you were there. And the fans flocked to see the supposed next coming of Jordan and cheered you on through crappy seasons, crappy games and crappy attitudes. They deserve at least an apology (and by they, I don't mean Dan Gilbert. That dude is nuts).
3. Admit that "The Decision" was a terrible PR move. Look, I don't care how much money you raised for the Boys and Girls clubs of Connecticut or the US or the World. Taking up a whole hour to let the NBA and its fans know where you were going to play this season is ridiculously self-indulgent. Plus, you should have at least given the Cleveland ownership the courtesy of knowing you wouldn't be returning. Come on.
4. After the first 3, put this thing behind you. Stop making stupid commercials with Nike, stop releasing the "hateful tweets" people sent you, stop claiming racism. Nobody is going to sympathize with you. Accept that, and move on.
5. Miss all your shots when facing the Celtics.

P.S. What is it with Nike and commercials like this? First they had the one with Tiger. Now this? Man if I was a Nike stockholder, I'd be scared. Now if you'll excuse me, I have some stock to sell.